Boy, If You Don't Stop

• June 23, 2017

Aubrey “DRAKE” Graham is a Grammy-Award winning R&B/Hip-Hop artist. His unique style of soft rap that deals with difficult subjects has propelled him on Billboard charts. Recently his work was rewarded when he received 13 awards at the 2017 Billboard Music Awards. This is the greatest number of accolades ever given to an artist in a single year at this event.

Thirteen awards means giving thirteen acceptance speeches. The one that stands out is the second one. After giving shout-outs of appreciation to Vanessa Hudgens, Nicki Minaj and Ludacris, Drake gave a shout-out to his father, Dennis Graham.

Drake’s dad, a drummer who worked with Jerry Lee Lewis, attended the event wearing a purple suit and purple shoes. He looked exceptional. Drake yelled out to his father, “Boy, if you don’t stop!” That started a frenzy of comments because of the phrase.

“Boy, if you don’t stop” was something not heard before. It set off a surge of comments. Moreover, it set off a controversy. Drake made the comment as a compliment to his father. It was referring to how his dad looked in the purple suit and shoes. In essence, Drake was saying his father rocked the suit and looked fantastic.

Some people took, “Boy, if you don’t stop” as a criticism.  Their thought was there’s a conflict between father and son that was being revealed. People wondered what had caused such a disagreement that Drake would take that moment to expose it. Consequently, they went about spreading their meaning to anyone who would listen.

How can a simple statement like, “Boy, if you don’t stop” be interpreted in opposite ways. It goes back to the problem we are having today with communication. Those hearing the message are not listening, they are interpreting. Instead of figuring out what the speaker said they are coming up with their own message.

Communication is the interchange of words. The purpose is to share knowledge, opinions, and facts. The value of this interchange is only as good as the receiver understanding what the speaker is saying. Otherwise communication did not occur.

Today people put in their own meaning as to what someone is saying. They aren’t listening. They do not try to capture what the speaker is saying. The point of communication is to impart what one person knows to another. If someone walks away from a conversation with what they thought instead of what was said there was no interchange. No message was delivered. No communication took place.

When involved in a conversation, listen to attain what is being shared. It doesn’t make sense to put in your own thoughts about what a person says. You are just listening to yourself. You haven’t learned anything. Why did you even get in a conversation with someone if you weren’t going to listen to them?

Listen, not interpret. Even if you disagree with them there is always something you can learn. If you don’t understand what they are saying, ask them. If you are unable to ask them then look at the context they said it in. The words surrounding the part you are questioning will give you a clue to what the speaker meant. Just like with Drake. Right before he gave a shout-out to his dad, he was complementing Vanessa Hudgens and Nicki Minaj. Drake was complementing his father and he did it in a big way. “Boy, if you don’t stop!”