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What is authentic charm and what is its power?\u00a0 Is it a kiss on the hand, batting the eyelashes, the debonair man in a Hollywood movie, a special quality that only some people are born with?<\/p>\n
I became interested in this subject after attending a business conference.\u00a0 A few colleagues said to me,\u201d you must spend time with Jack\u201d, who was also a business colleague.<\/p>\n
I said, okay, why? The response was because he is sooo charming.\u00a0 So I met Jack and we had an enjoyable conversation.\u00a0 We laughed and talked.\u00a0 He was great to be around.\u00a0 He was, well, charming.<\/p>\n
What did I experience that was labeled charm? We were in a crowded, noisy room, but the attention was on our conversation.\u00a0 I felt important and engaged in a worthwhile encounter in the midst of a lot of people and activity.<\/p>\n
I realized, in a general way, that charm is applying specific skills, such as listening and focusing on the person before you.<\/p>\n
While some people have more \u201cnatural charm\u201d than others, we all have some to build on. These skills can be learned and polished through desire and practice.<\/p>\n
My definition of charm is \u201cthe ability and skill to positively influence communication with others so that you both enjoy the interaction, as well as the ability and skill to behave in a manner that attracts others\u201d. \u00a0I am convinced that learning the components of charming behavior can help us do our jobs better, network better, be better parents, spouses and colleagues.<\/p>\n
Charm is about mindset, skill development and execution and can be employed to reduce conflict, generate business as well as create situations that are win\/win.<\/p>\n
Listed below are some key behaviors that will increase your Charm Quotient (CQ):<\/p>\n
C: Create a physical and mental space to be open to receive others.<\/strong> Put away the cellphone. Focus on the person you are with.<\/p>\n H: Hone your listening skills.\u00a0<\/strong> Listen with your eyes, your body language, your words (such as tell me more) as well as your ears.\u00a0 Listen for nuances in the conversation that can be funny. Laugh at yourself and with others.<\/p>\n A: Acknowledge others, your paying attention helps people open up.<\/strong> Be present or schedule another time to connect.\u00a0 Show a genuine interest in the lives of others. Ask questions about their opinions and what they read.\u00a0 Don\u2019t take things personally; often they are not about you.<\/p>\n R: Create rapport as you initiate conversation.<\/strong> Have a general knowledge about a lot of things.\u00a0 Practice communicating effectively with others.\u00a0 See the best in everything, even conflict. Conflict brings about change.<\/p>\n M: Master body language.<\/strong> What is the other person\u2019s posture and gesture telling you?\u00a0 Tap into that.<\/p>\n These behaviors will help you to extend yourself in an effective way.\u00a0 We are magnets, we radiate thought waves that are picked up by others and impact our\u00a0 interaction.<\/p>\n Authentic charm lowers defensiveness, yours and others, and allows you to get to what is important.<\/p>\n Observe the behavior of the most charming person you know. Identify what he or she does.\u00a0 Watch the effect on others. Adapt to your own style those behaviors that will help you to be prepared, poised, polished and powerful.<\/p>\n Doris Young Boyer<\/strong> <\/em>is a keynote speaker on Gracious Leadership, an author, Etiquette, Protocol and Lifestyle Coach. She is trained by the Protocol School of Washington and is an advisor to the C-Suite Network.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" What is authentic charm and what is its power?\u00a0 Is it a kiss on the hand, batting the eyelashes, the debonair man in a Hollywood movie, a special quality that only some people are born with? I became interested in this subject after attending a business conference.\u00a0 A few colleagues said to me,\u201d you must […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":74,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wpupg_custom_link":[],"wpupg_custom_link_behaviour":["default"],"wpupg_custom_image":[],"wpupg_custom_image_id":[],"footnotes":""},"categories":[70,38,58,47,55],"tags":[],"editorial_calendar_month":[],"class_list":["post-5458","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-business-development","category-leadership","category-lifestyle","category-personal-development","category-skills"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\n